Thursday, July 9, 2009

I Would Starve in the Wild

K, so I purchased a bottle of rabbit repellent and zealously sprayed the hell out of what remains of my "garden" while calling the rabbit every Jewish, Italian, Irish and East Cleveland name in the book. The spray smells like fermented taint, so it's gotta work.

Anyway, as I turn around to walk away, my foot almost slams down on this:

(shamelessly swiped from Danzig, if only for the sheer irony of someone named Danzig taking cute baby bunny pictures)


The bunny never ran away and instead cowered below me, looking up with those unnerving big baby bunny eyes. Dammit!

In the span of 90 seconds, I went from a raging Most Wanted on PETA's shitlist to a jelly-spined, baby-talking sucker who fed it the last of my organic baby carrots. This, knowing full well that I'm only inviting the entire bunny clan to make a bu-fay of my garden. And I wasn't the only one sickened by the lepus fever. Bobzilla was soon on the ground cooing and making kissy faces.

Darwin would be ashamed.

In other Ohio animal vs. garden news, an area 75-year old woman found a fawn ravaging her garden and beat it to death with a shovel. Flower bed = 1; Baby deer = 0

I'm sure there's a lesson to be learned from this.


  1. Can't live with 'em, can't shoot 'em.

  2. My bunnies woudld like you and your garden. ;)

  3. I love a cute widdle bunny rabbit!!! You are so funny, feeding it - but I would have done the same thing.

  4. Are you a fermented taint expert?

    And I'm glad you caved into the wonder that is baby bunny.

  5. Yeah, how could you turn that away. You fell right into his trap. :-)

  6. I worry about how much the deer/shovel story made me laugh...