Thursday, May 28, 2009

I Won a Major Award!

Tricia has bestowed upon me my first--and what is probably the most meaningful--anti-weight loss blog award by a member of the the snarky weight blog trifecta, Tricia. And I didn't even have to nominate myself or whore myself out begging for votes. Kneel, suckas:

But wouldn't you know it, there are strings attached. In order to properly accept Jacks**t's prestigious honor, I gotta work for it and make a list of seven things I admire about Tricia. Great, homework. And I'm right in the middle of my move, packing and cleaning. I ain't got time for this hoo ha! So, here was my initial response to Tricia after reading the fine print:

But screw it. The oven cleaner fumes are forcing me to sit down and take in some oxygen. And, really, how could I refuse?

So, here are 7 things that I totally dig about Tricia:

1. Girl makes me laugh til I practically fart in my desk chair. When I get the alert she's posted a new blog, I put calls on hold. Even when her life sucks at a particular moment, she will find a twisted humorous spin on things and basically try and keep it together rather than fall to a corner and suck her thumb.

2. She doesn't take this whole weight loss thing so deadly serious or view it so narrowly. There is more to getting your shit together than logging meals and workouts and writing the 28th chapter about being trapped in fat hell. It's a process that is as much mental as it is physical.

3. While her cat may be an asshole, I know that deep down inside there is a crazy cat lady in that heart of hers.

4. She makes chiropractors seem almost vag-worthy.

5. If I had to change careers, I would totally work in a cubicle farm with her. And then steal her Buddha.

6. There is no pretense about her, unless she's kept things really masterfully hidden. What you read is what you get.

7. She agrees that hot weather needs to suck it. She is, therefore, right.

8. She's Irish.

Yes, I know that's 8. But I threw an extra one in to make up for the grave error she made when she mentioned "zombie run." Zombies don't run, I don't care what fans of the Dawn of the Dead remake and 28 Days/Weeks Later (and, technically, those dudes are rage-infected, not zombified) say. *flashes slow-moving zombie gang sign*

And to pass the Shitty blog joy along, I nominate Kristi (for being a kick-ass virtual trainer) and Jelly Bean (for her gadget blogs and just being all around awesome)! Now, shower me with love and praise. Time to go back and pack. Ugh.


  1. I love look awesome! Those arms are looking good! I got to check out Tricia's site. Just found Jack, he is hilarious.

  2. I don't know if I should apologize or congratulate you.

    I completely underestimated how many folks would appreciate the sh*ttiness of their blogs recognized.

    Rock on.

  3. Hah! You are so funny for a skinny bitch. That's right, I said it - you are downright boney!

  4. Haha, I would have been purely honored with only the one-fingered salute, but all the flattery just adds to the prize! And Shelley's right, you are freaking skinny...YOU BITCH! :P

  5. Golly, I am, um, honored? LOL What a fun award - thanks!

    You look freakin' awesome! Me and my flabby arms bow down before you...

  6. best way to salute Tricia EVER

    lol @ zombie run

  7. OK, this has to be the best blog meme ever.

    And I love your photographic response. You are indeed worthy of the great honor bestowed upon you.

  8. You need to use that pic as your profile picture!!

  9. I adored you before, but I'm now into all-out worship.

  10. "While her cat may be an asshole..."

    LOL! That had me spewing my Crystal Light-spiked water all over my desk.

    Congratulations...I think...for winning this highly prestigious and strongly odoriferous dog-patty award!


  11. i dig chicks that aren't afraid to flip the bird. oh and fart when they laugh... hot

  12. You guys rawk. I wish I had enough middle fingers for everyone! *gushes*

  13. ready for that weigh in. is it wed. yet? miss you

  14. what happened to the Wed weigh in? :(